What To Do About Potty Regression After a New Baby Arrives

My daughter was 99 percent potty trained this past summer, and with a new baby on the way, we were ecstatic at the thought that only one of them would be in diapers! Well, that unfortunately has not been the case. Our daughter has now totally regressed in her potty training now that her baby brother is two months old.

I've read that this is common for older siblings to regress in potty training once the new baby arrives. However, I was certain it would not happen to us, as Taylor was doing so well using the potty. Boy, was I wrong!

I decided to do a little research to find some tips on how to deal with regression- there is a lot of good information out there on the topic. Hopefully what I have found will help others out there that may be experiencing the same thing!

First off, what causes potty regression? The answer is simple: stress! Your oldest child may be feeling emotionally charged about the arrival of a new baby as it takes attention away from him or her. Refusing to go to the potty or asking to be “changed” may be your child’s way of regaining some control of the new situation and refocusing the attention back on them.

Once regression begins to happen, it is important to talk to your toddler about how much you love them and how the new baby is not taking his or her place. It is also important to make time for your oldest child and do special things with them. This may mean some of the household chores go by the wayside for a while, but making your preschooler feel loved and secure is much more important.

Here are some tips on how to deal with potty regression.

- When you get frustrated about the potty regression, it’s time to take a step away from training. Try revisiting training in a few days when you are calmer about it. Your toddler will sense your frustration and this will continue to make them regress.

- Make it a completely positive experience rather than a negative one. Use potty charts and reward stickers, potty treats, or lots of love, hugs and praise. Do not use negative reinforcement or try to discipline your child when accidents happen. Frustration and negativity displayed during potty training and regression will only create more obstacles.

- Allow your toddler to be your “big helper” when it comes to the new baby. The more you allow your child to be a part of the new baby’s routine, the more they will get used to the idea that the baby is here to stay and they will learn to adjust to sharing mom and dad. And once your child begins to feel less threatened, he or she will feel less stressed and hopefully get back on track with potty training.

- Use the words “big girl/big boy,” “big helper,” and “big sister/big brother” as often as possible. Making your toddler feel like a big girl or boy will make them strive to live up to the moniker and want to do big girl/big boy things, such as use the potty.

- Minimize the amount of talk you use while cleaning up accidents. Be matter-of-fact, and simply say, “Pee and poo poo go in the potty, not in your underwear.” Do not harp on the accident and do not belittle your child.

- If your child continues to experience potty training regression after several months and you continue to feel frustrated, contact your pediatrician for further advice. Sometimes it takes a fresh perspective to help you with this trying time.

Potty Training Tips

It’s been a long week at our house. A 2-year-old child plus potty training plus mommy being pregnant with baby number two equals total exhaustion!!!!

I thought I would share some tips with our loyal Pure and Honest Kids blog readers that have helped me this week during potty training boot camp. If you have any tips to share, leave them under the comments section! I know they would be much appreciated. Happy potty training!

-----Pick up some potty books at the local library so your child can have special books to read during potty time. Read with your child while he or she sits on the potty and “tries” to go.

----- Schedule potty breaks. Set a timer or watch for 30 minute to one hour intervals and ask your child when the timer goes off if he or she needs to use the potty. At first, you may want to have your child actually “try” to use the bathroom when the timer goes off because they might not be aware of the signs of when they have to "go" yet. Over time, your child will recognize the signs of having to “go” and will tell you it’s time to use the potty.

----- Once they can tell you they need to go to the potty, get your child to the potty quick! Consider having a special potty that you can take from room-to-room with you for those times that you need to quickly find a toilet.

----- Praise, praise, and more praise! When your child uses the potty, offer them praise! The more excited you get about them using the potty, the more they will understand it’s a big deal and want to do it again! Sing silly songs, come up with a potty dance or offer incentives when your child successfully uses the potty.

----- Accidents are a-okay. Treat accidents lightly, as they are inevitable. When it happens, stay calm. Just simply say, “Uh-oh! You’ve had an accident. Let’s get you changed. Next time you should tell mommy (or daddy) you need to use the potty,” and quickly change them.

----- Remain patient. When you get frustrated, your child will sense it. If potty training has both you and your child in tears, maybe it’s time to take a break from it and come back to it a few days later when both of you can approach potty training with a clear head!

Good luck with this parenting and child milestone! Also, check out Pure and Honest Kids excellent selection of "big girl" and "big boy" underwear here! Special underwear makes kids excited about switching from diapers to big boy and girl undies!